"Unfortunately due to the sheer volume of comments, plus the high number of new people who wish to join the conversation, the Strictly Come Dancing messageboard will be closing tonight at 10 p.m."

????????????????

Old rubber lips?

The svelte little sequined, guinea pig formerly known as a political journalist?

Wake me up when he's gone-gone!

Strictly Come Dancing! A contradiction in terms surely.

I think I shall stop paying my licence fee!